They say it is discourteous to ask a woman how old she is. Some women would tell you that it’s downright rude! It’s a number that your birth certificate can reveal, and for the old fashioned gal, is only surreptitiously disclosed.As time goes on, the smooth supple skin of youth gives way to a weathered look and callused hands, reflecting decades of hard work, wisdom and experience. 

It is inevitable to age; for men, women, animals, and even nature! But for women, the ageing process seems to be more of an impact.
“With a woman, her age limits her possibilities of getting a mate,” says Director of Ageing in the Ministry of Social Development, Dr Jennifer Rouse. Dr Rouse explains that males have the advantage of securing a mate at any time, and so women are insecure about their appearance and age. According to Dr Rouse, this trepidation about ageing and its process is also generational and cultural. “It is a legacy inherited by their grandparents and they don’t even know the sense of it. “In the olden days, women never disclosed their age, work and marital status. In the family institution, a fearful mother was a result of a fearful grandmother, and so this fear continues to transcend through generations.”

The anti ageing process is one that has created and maintained a lucrative niche market in the cosmetic industry. One can easily find a plethora of anti ageing skin care creams and serums in cosmetic stores which are geared at reversing the clock. For women who work in Hollywood, life and work revolve around the physical beauty and celebrities go to all lengths to remain youthful. Wrinkles and sagging skin are features that must be hidden or disguised for as long as possible. “There is pressure placed on the woman in terms of her marketability,” says Dr Rouse. The ever popular Botox is one such treatment that women resort to for fear of appearing old too quickly. “Sometimes these products make you worse off. It removes that glow, those natural lines. “Looking up to Hollywood and Bollywood images sets the frame of reference for pretty versus ugly. Its eurocentric,” says Dr Rouse, who explains that this obsession about appearance and youth is arguably an issue of esteem and self acceptance.

According to Rouse, there is pressure on women to look like models and be like them. “You have to consider what you are as enough. It’s a psychological issue more than a physical, the psychological is the driver.” One of the ministry’s purposes it to change the stigma about ageing. “Its about making people feel more comfortable in their skin. It gives women incentive to be free about themselves,” she says. The more simple remedies like laughing, having a positive social milieu and exercise can all naturally enhance a person’s appearance. Dr Rouse added that the key to changing our attitude is by challenging societal norms pushed and played by the media and becoming more informed. “It comes in knowledge in the form of information.”

Dr Rouse advised that women seek inspiration by looking at successful women who make ageing look easy. She also encourages a lot of introspection and soul searching. “Identify with women your age who are authors. Apply what they feel and test it,” she recommends. Although there is a long way to go in changing norms and attitudes, Dr Rouse does concur that the new generation does things a bit differently. “The baby boomers are upgrading themselves,” says Dr Rouse, who cites examples of career women, and women who go back to school as adults as examples. According to Rouse, women are now getting married or having children at a later stage in life because of career priorities.

By Tennille Alleyne